So I have this stupid grin on my face from an earlier conversation.

Now it will probably be short lived considering the things that were said and things that were inadvertently revealed but at least I am smiling.

Haven't laughed like that in a long time tho I must say. Hehe my pookie bear how corny is that. I can't believe I called them some sorta cutesy name...ick. That is so not me. Next thing I'll be doling out hugs like a lunatic who comes on here *eyeroll*
..................................................

What really is a flam doh? :S

....................................................................

So I made some calls today and things are looking a little promising where my security is concerned. Let's all keep our fingers crossed shall we? ^__^

.......................................................

Feel better Kerry. *hugg*

So tell me again what I ever saw in him? Better yet tell me what I ever saw in any of them? For some ridiculous reason I am here pondering why I ever liked...anyone. Cus to be honest it just seems really pointless and I kinda glad that I decided what I did. Not just cus of the trying to keep myself clean etc but also cus the whole idea of relationships is so lost on me that I truly think that if I were in one it would be doomed to fail.

I mean truly...when you think about it why are they so important to us? Because we need companionship? And I mean it's not even romantic relationships that are stress. Normal friendships can become a burden too. You can still feel betrayed cus here you've really invested your time and heart into something you hope will prosper. Perhaps it's because people expect so much more from a boyfriend or a girlfriend than they do from their friends......so I guess that means friendships are easier to have and maintain than a relationship?

Frankly I real sick of people saying "oh doan let past experiences hinder you blah blah." Not that I got many experiences of which to speak but I can't deal with disappointment to be honest. It bugs me and bugs me to no freaking end and frankly I can do without the stress. Besides only an idiot goes into a situation like that with their eyes closed hoping for the best. And this is not a situation where faith is required.

So before I become a girl that has a string of failed "Somethings" riding her tail this is what I am going to say...."Screw the whole thing." Relationships and love or whatever it is could dead as far as I damn well concerned.

...................................................................................

lol this must be the once a month "I hate men and relationships" blog that Suffie says all the girls make. :)

Dammit.....

Maaaaaaaan!!! I had something to blog about but this woman just come in here and I had to log off Trillian so fast that I forget what it was!!!!

*grumble grumble*

Neways so hear this drama!! De parental units leaving the island a day earlier!!! Let there be rejoicing!!! I am definitely gonna do the whole pizza thing. I was considering a lime but I ppl that I know have NO sorta behaviour atall and I can't risk things getting smashed. :P


So lately I have been making an effort to become a better cook (u dis A/C cold as wuh den) since I think all women should be able to do a lil something. This is not me saying that it is all up to the women to cook tho so Raisx and his pie loving self can go jump off a cliff. BAKE YUH OWN PIE!! :@

But seriously I just want to be able to do as much as I can ya know?

Good heavens now I have the munchies. 0_0 mmmmm a frescante with warm toast and scrambled eggs with some bacon right now would put me on cloud9......

I always wondered tho...why is it considered rude or insulting to tell someone to suck salt? Surely it's just the manner in which it was said that causes one to think it's funny?

And another thing ppl. Stop calling me a white girl cus the joke is getting old. And Billy and Piney can't say that I should not call dem goats cus she called me a sheep first :P Tit fuh tat!!

I'm in my sucks to be me mode. Even though I got the confirmation I needed to know that I am doing the rite thing I STILL feel like a heel.
Back to work this morning...in fact I here all now....the guy who was subbing for me came in at 12 apparently and by the time I got here he had done all the work for the mornin so not much left for me to do today besides find some locals......I guess I have that to be thankful for but now I ain got jack to do for a good 4 hours.

Ok so enter Mr Mystery. I dunno why guys decide to pop when I am just not checking. He's offsetting my groove man. Worse thing is he's tons of fun to talk to and he's rather intelligent. It alternates anyway...lol....Anyway I sticking to my resolve. It's all about having good friends rite now. (rthen again why am I assuming he wants something more than just plain old friendship?)

Lol my dad got his first cell phone last nite....he's a little excited *rolls eyes* The kids are furious cus they think they should have one as well. What do 10 and 12 year olds need a phone for? All of a sudden payphones don't exist....

I need a backrub tho. And a REAL vacation. Away from here.

Blind blind blind. 0_0
............................................................................................................

Oh rite new blogs, Just added Skye's blog and Kimme's blog....Kim hasn't blogged yet cus she sucks. AND cus she has a big nose. ^__^ I also added a Juicy Pineapple (hahahaha) to the mixup 0_0 Her words not mine I swear.

To Boo ^__^

This blog is dedicated to Corey better known as "boo".

So yesterday our machine went on the fritz and sorta flooded our laundry room. First thing it would not stop running and then the pipe was kinda stuck and would not lock off. So I mean water was just running. Now common sense would tell you to go find the main piper outside and turn that off....however...I could not find it...since Daddy dearest had it buried...under sand....

So me and mum (helpless females) had to call a couple of oru male neighbours to help turn off the pipe. No luck. So we there catching water and tossing it out meantime the room is flooded and oh joy of joys it's leaking out into the hall and all up in my bathroom.
So at this point I remember the water authorities were supposed to be in the road next to us doing ...well water stuff. So I call boo and ask him to tell someone ANYONE if he sees them to haul butt over here and someone get that pipe off!

Lo and behold i see Corey chipping coming cross by me. My man dive rite into the whole mess. Held buckets with me and tossed of water until one of our neighbours finally found the piper under the sand (he dug for it). Then when we got the pipe that was stuck off, he managed to get it loosened!! Then we sprayed some CRC on it to keep it loose.

Then the real work began...cleanup.....that boy stayed with me till the very end. I mean I was there ready to cry I was so fustrated and he talk sooo much junk to make me laugh. We pretended to be making this exercise video that included the swishing movements of mopping since it tones those arms baby!! lol. And after we did all that mopping up...came the squeezing out...my arms never ache so bad yet.

I will never forget this day...It took us two hours to clean up that mess. And he stayed with me the WHOLE time. And then afterwards I ain had no choice but to offer him dinner at the very least I mean he save me and my mother. She couldn't do much and in any case she was real distraught. My "boo"really came thru for me and I just wanted to let him know just how much that meant to me. That rite there is a true friend.

...............................................................................................

Oh yeah so me and that other dude are speaking again. *rolls eyes* Kimme ran intervention so we back on track. :P Thanks girlie and Love to you Mr Your Friend.

....................................................................................

Oh and the kids and the parental units are still going away!!! And I found me a roomie!!! hurrah!!! Yeah so we still having this party or wuh???? *eyeroll* :P

Break Stuff

That's kinda how I feel rite now.

By now some of you may know about my unfortunate work situation. And frankly I feel like breaking his face in. I dunno what the hell I did to deserve this. I'm mad, I'm sad, I'm horribly disappointed and above all I am scared to death. I truly hate this. And it just figures that this would happen to me.

Right now I don't feel positive about anything at all. My friend who ceased speaking to me over that girl is STILL not speaking to me. And now I have this sneaking suspicion that he is speaking to her. My my my what an idiot ur proving urself to be. Hey as Mayne said it's your blog say what you want right?? Dammit.

But Mel will cease to worry about problems that have nothing to do with her cus she has her own issues. Big issues at that and cannot be bothered with trivial man and woman love triangles that does not include me. Boy does that sound obnoxious but I doan give a damn.

So I saw the doc today and she gave me a week home. Today was very productive, went into town to do some...ahem..business. Went to get a new ID card cus the last one...omg the picture was hideous and I know I am not a hideous child. Lol it wasn't only that the card was old anyway and needed to be changed. At least the pic came out better than last time. Since I am a non national I doan have that yellow background that Barbadians normally have so in my last pic I kinda faded into the background and looked so ridiculously pale. 0_0 Still no background this time but the chick who took it somehow managed to bring me out of the background. I look semi cute if I do say so myself. *eyeroll*

So what to do with my time home huh? I'll still go kickboxing of course. Getting better at it...my issue is still being afraid to do the kicks and stuff in front of ppl. But then you realise that nobody ain checking fuh you!! That is until he pulls you out for that stupid spot check!!! THAT I hate.

Ok so beach it is. And if Mum is up to it I will go with her to see the Passion tomorrow nite. I sure Olympus was ram off tonite.

One last thing....I think most of you believe in prayer? Say one for me please cus I kinda need it right now. Thanks.

Moving On...

So you know that feeling of peace and calm you get after you've made up your mind about something that was bothering you for ages? I was having that all weekend. God willing VERY soon all my stressing and worrying will be over and I can relax for a bit....

Mummy did the unthinkable and popped her arm out on Saturday night. I was horrified I won't tell a lie. My mum is a really strong person and to see her sit and cry cus of the pain just shook me up. And it got me to thinking...what the hell would I do if my Mum had to pass away? I felt helpless just with her arm being out of use for a bit. I ended up cooking and all that jazz yesterday cus clearly I ain intend for her to be using her arm so she can hurt it again. She got up all prepared to cook and found me in the kitchen doing my thing (haha) and mi ss thang tried to order me back to bed. I doubt it most severely.

She's home for like a week now. And I honestly was going to take the week home with her so I could do all the stuff she does so she wont have that trouble. But of course there is no one here to cover for me.....gee what's new?

Had my little cuz over after church yesterday. She is the sweetest thing evar!!! She literally had the run of my whole room. The other two kids were in there as well and they musta been soo glad she was there cus normally they're not allowed in my room....they break stuff!! But little missy was in her element boh. Oh rite just in case no one knows her name is Katelyn (doan ask why her mum spelt it like that) and she's about 2 years old. And I finally got her to give me a kiss last nite!! Usually if you say Katie gimme a kiss this little rascal presents her cheek for a kiss. the nerve of her!! LOL. But yesterday she gave me one right on the cheek. I think I want to keep her. :S.

I was in a horrible mood yesterday. Came into work and nothing was how it was supposed to be and it really ticked me off. You know when you just get fed up of things remaining the same after you've pointed out a million times what needs to be done? Well that was me yesterday. So I did what I could and then I went home. Ended up spending the day online anyway since my aunt needed help with her article thing...that woman.....manages to drive me bonkers even when she's in Jamaica! 0_0

Second reason I was pissed off was cause one of my closest friends called me to tell me he was disappointed in me as he was under the impression I had taken back something he said to a certain girl. He also seems to be under the impression that I've been spreading his business to other ppl....heh....I so was not in the mood to deal with that. He'll probably come on here and see this and buse me yet again but I'm beyond caring. First off he asked me not to say anything and I DIDN'T!! Why is it when I try to get my friends out of a situation that has the potential to hurt them it ends up backfiring in my face?? From now on I am just gonna let the people I love continue to make idiots of themselves. Don't come to me after asking me why I didn;t warn you cus when I do warn you y;all neva want to listen and I am tired of wasting my breath.

I doan even know what to say to him anymore......If ur hurt and you lashed out then fine but doan be lashing out at the people who are only trying to protect you.
.................................................................................................................

In happier news.....Mum has revealed to me that she, my dad and the kids will be going to St Vincent for a week!! Of course when I first heard my immediate reaction was why wasn't I invited to this lil shindig. She goes well that's why I am telling you now. 0_0 (oh rite duh Mel) Anyway I doan intend to be spending any sorta money on a plane ticket anytime soon. So basically I get the house for myself for that week. Well so we think cus rite now they're still on standby. But in the event that they do go I need a roomie for at least the weekend cus that's Easter weekend. I'm hardly home during the week so I am not worried then but I gotta find someone to crash with me for the weekend definitely. And to answer the questions I am sure will come NO there will be no party at the bachelorette pad. *me rolls eyes*
..................................................................................................

I really AM very pissed at that boy.........

............................................................................


I miss Kimme...I haven't seen her online in ages. :S

One week til Passion of the Christ.......I feel like I shouldn't be excited but rather more reflective and such....I know some ppl have already downloaded it....how utterly disgusting.
......................................................................................................................

I ainno wuh to say bout this fella tho. Someone asked me about a comment I made in an earlier blog and now it's just got me wondering about the guy again. I trying to forget they exist tho.

........................................................................................................................
I can be such a total airhead sometimes. Twice today something someone said to me just went right over my little head. I attributed it to the fact that I had no sleep last nite.

........................................................................................................
Sex. Is that all everyoen is concerned with? Read a book for God's sake.....

I happen to find Chefette's salads very yummy and to be honest I was wondering if it was just me. I could honestly just eat a pasta salad a day with like a piece of chicken for protein or what have you (haha) and of course a frescante (staple come on n ow) and I would be happy for the rest of the day! Sounds weird? Well I doan care. ^__^.
.................................................

So lately I've been having some really odd reactions to a friend of mine. Sometimes I'm happy to hear them and others I just want to hit them. It's extremely unfair of me but can one person be so freaking blind?? Then again let me just remind myself that ppl's actions should not affect my attitude.
..........................................................

I actually kinda like Good Charlotte...Cousin Ashley isn't too impressed since he's a punk rocker himself. He insists they sold out. In order to educate me on true punk rock he's made me listen to this band called Me First and the Gimme Gimmes 0_0 ok Ash you get thru ok??

........................................................................................................

Musich and Echo guy is actually rather cute. Banana here is convinced that it's only cus he bears a remarkable resemblance to HIM. Can't believe you women actually asked me about that on Saturday. Bah!!! :P

......................................................................................................

Would you believe that the Olympics are only a few months away and those Grecian clowns have not finished the Stadium as yet???? Olympics best doan flop this year cus o dem slackness otherwise I ban my trip to Greece!! Yeah I was planning to go at 24 with Kim. We were obsessed with Greek mythlogy at school.
........................................................................................................
Good heavens this was quite a ramble 0_0

Weekend wasn't bad at all. ^__^ Spent most of Saturday cleaning the house and scrubbed my shower. Oh my mummy must be soo proud of me *rolls eyes*

Listened to my father complain about the fact that two of his fish had mysteriously disappeared and he's convinced the kids are the culprits. Why they would want to even steal his fish I dunno. He seems to be the only person who thinks the fish are worth this much noise and trouble.

Nearly told a busdriver where to get off when I was making my way up to Bubba's to meet the girls for our ladies nite out. Now see the see bus was marked on Kirtons...I ainno where Kirton's is so I asked the guy is this bus going up Hastings. The dude barked at me pplz. "I can't hear you what you are sayign to me!!"

So since I had approached him very politely I was quite taken aback. But I persisted and I said once again "Is this bus going up Hastings"

He barks at me again. Now I am not crazy. I can tell when someone has an attitude and believe you me this man had a nasty one. So me not in the mood to repeat myself or be yelled at once again for no good reason told him nevermind and I stepped of the bus step. So now he gin look at the woman across from him and ask her "wait wuh she just ask me??!!" The w oman replied she was just asking if the bus is going up Hastings. He gin go "oh you want the bypass bus?Well this is the bypass bus!"

"Well that is all I was trying to ask you!" So I got in and paid my money and went and sit down. You believe that unmannerly pig carried on bout how I play I too important to speak to he and this I this and I that..that man carry on from down st james to up near the Globe. I was so mad. But I stayed calm cus clearly he's a donkey.

Now see then I started wondering...Mel what if you were rude to him (tho I didn;t see how) maybe you should say ur sorry. So I said ok just to clear myself at least with God if I was rude for no reason I will apologize as it won;t take much of me to do so you know?

So when I was getting close to my stop now I get up to go up to the front...and this woman near the front was talking to another woman and when I passed I heard the first one say "oh it was her" So I look round like..."ok....then" Then I heard her telling the other woman " He was so rude to that young lady. All she did was ask him if the bus going up a certain way and he snapped at her. Jusso!! I ain surprise she tell he go long cus If I was she I was not gonna get in a bus when he was giving me all that attitude"

so me now sooo relieved to realise that somebody else saw that was like "Oh so you saw the way he reacted!!"

So then she proceeded to tell me that apparently this particular driver has a nasty attitude and is always snapping at passengers. And still he driving.

But you know what? I still said sorry to him. The look on his face was priceless. He was in shock. I have no reason to fight and make n oise over something trivial if that is what he was looking for. So I said sorry and got off the bus with my head in the air. I'm bigger than this attitude dammit.

oh yeah but that is not what I wanted to blog about.....I wanted to blog about our night out....

Anyway it was fun, girls are mad, no men crashed (whoot!!) and Bubba's rocks!!! We gotta do it again chicas!! ^___^

Toodlez!! (bandwagon syndrome LOL!)

I seem to be having an identity crisis.......

I dunno why I doan have the strength to see things and just leave them alone...
I need a new job...gee how long have I been saying that.....but where am I gonna find one that pays me as well as I am being paid now?

I need to go to the beach......

I must.. I MUST... I must decrease my bust.

Yes you read it right. I sick sick sick of my chest. It's bad enuff I have like virtually no sort of behind MUST I be chesty and offset the whole thing?!!! And no I did not just now notice this. I knew for years I had no behind. Just that lately it's beginning to bug me to no end. :( I know there are ppl out there with much bigger problems than this but honestly it's just one of the days where this thing is annoying me. Dem ain got some way for me to decrease my bust size and fast? Either that or grow a rump. :S stupse.

...........................................................................................................................................

3 bucks for a flippin screw den. The shades I bought the other day sorta broke...well the screw came out. So yesterday when I went to pick up my contacts which cost 100 bucks mind you, I asked technician dude if he could maybe put a screw in these shades that broke. Dude charged me 3 dollars. I mean it wasn't like I walked in off the streets begging for a favour. I mean I do business there every month. He couldn't have fixed em fuh free??? Maybe it's just me.....cus If I were him I wasn't gonna charge someone for a screw of all things.
................................................................................................................................

My father must think I am psychic or something. I come home last nite from kickboxing and he looks at me with this ......expression on his face..."Some man called for you and wanted to know if u had gotten home yet...do you know who that person is Melissa?"

(Like DUH!! I jess get thru the door how I s'posed to know? )

So I was like well Dad I just got home So no I honestly can't tell you who called for me.

*looks at me once again* "Ok...if you say so...." Turns and walks in the bedroom.

*insert dramatic eyeroll here*

This time it was Boo calling me to talk about his woman issues and he knows either I am not home or I am sleeping so he just ask outrite if I get home yet. God havest mercy. My father just ain easy.

I had a lovely weekend.

Saturday was cool. Went shopping up Sheraton with Laura then came home...stupid shades broke mind you...well the screw came out so I guess I can get that fixed...or else that would a real waste of 20 bucks!!!

Well I spent the night at home....god that felt so good...just being able to lie in bed and read a book and listen to some music ^__^. Went online for awhile later on....

BUT Sunday was the day. I wasn't upstairs for worship cus one of our pastors had asked me to write something for them so I was busy sorting that out. But when it was time for our head pastor to preach I went upstairs cus I KNOW my muddah woulda come downstairs fuh my tail.

My word God just took over in that service. She was doing her lil warm up thing just praising God and stuff. Den my woman said something like " And God moves in mysterious and powerful ways..he took a respected actor like Mel Gibson .." Man who tell she do that!! I ainno wuh she said after that cus me and Shakila went off! LOL.!!

Man she is just as excited about this film as I am if not more. MY woman launch into a good 45 minutes talking about the film and we were right behind here all the way. Now check this....she is soo anti - cineman it's not funny. Now guess who has ordered the entire church to go see the film...AND will be going to see it herself??? I can't wait to tell Porchae ( my cousin) about it. Her mother at the movies??? I feel for the people who dare to talk through it. tsk tsk tsk lolol. But besides that something just happened in church yesterday...the whole place was just in chaos.......not as in something was wrong...but something out of the ordinary was taking place. And when altar call was made for once I didnt hesitate. I grabbed Shak (like I was gonna go by myself) and we went up.

It's time I stopped running from God tho..It gin be hard to do but it has to be done...And when I was standing there all I could t hink was...what could be greater than serving God...I mean what greater good is there....

It's so easy to talk the talk but hard to walk the walk. Only God can help me keep on the st raight and narrow....

So many things were said to me yesterday while I stood there...But you know it's really up to me if they come to past...cuz God never breaks his promises to us...We just stray and thus forfeit what was there waiting for us...

Anywhos......I gotta change..and change now...Yesterday was a day I woan forget anytime soon that's for sure.

*sigh* So wuh wunna doh for the weekend nah? ^__^